Paul and I spent our 19th anniversary in the Emergency Room. Ben was hit in the head with a metal golf club at the park last night and he needed some stitches.
Paul took our three boys and some friends over to the park to practice golfing for the Golf Merit Badge for scouts.
Ben ran in front of one of the boys right when he was taking a swing. Jeff ran home to get me and really riled me up by claiming that Ben’s scalp was showing, so much blood, and he was completely upset and crying. I ripped over to the park in our van and then Shelly drove us to the ER while Paul and I held Ben in the back seat. As we drove I was applying Trauma Life Essential Oil blend to Bens toes, three drops each foot, and praying to know how to help him. Paul gave him a blessing and then we arrived.
I was thinking….Brain Injury, Concussion, Surgery, etc etc while we drove and was totally freaked out by the time the first nurse walked into the waiting room. The Male Nurse immediately did a brain injury analysis by having Ben answer some questions and get up and walk. It was then that I saw his cut for the first time, and the relief I felt was tangible. I truly was afraid that the golf club had crushed his skull, based on what Jeff had said, but quickly realized that the cut, although a deep gash that required layers of stitching, was not so bad, and that he would be fine.

Ben this morning in his Daddys arms.
Ironically this is the point where I truly lost it emotionally. I started shaking and was overwhelmed by the adrenaline rush. Ben was a champ, he never screamed, just whimpered a little each time the needle went into his skin and today we took him to our chiropractor to get his cranium adjusted. His eye is all swollen and he has the beginnings of a nasty black eye, but we have not observed any evidence of a concussion, although we are watching for it.
It is funny to me that because we have chosen to give birth to our last two babies at home that some friends assume that we have given up on allopathic medicine altogether.
Not True.
I was so grateful for the professionalism and skill of the doctor and nurse we worked with. These two men were so kind to our son, and so tuned it to his needs as a four year old. They truly did an amazing job, always concious of his pain and his needs, bringing him juice and stickers and a coloring book. A volunteer at the hospital offered to get us drinks, and a nurse (a dear friend from church) helped me get a cup of peppermint herbal tea, and offered much love and emotional support.
I spend so much time bashing the allopathic medical machine here on my blog that it was a good reminder to interface with the medical people and be reminded once again of the wonderful work they do with emergencies and injuries.
Yesterday I was reading some of the links from Pajamas Media and found these two posts:
First I read a rant from the Advice Goddess, who tends to use alot of profanity. She was upset about kids sleeping in the same beds with their parents.
Then I read Dr. Helen talking about Moms who get together and drink wine while the kids play. She was questioning child led everything and even encouraged the moms to go ahead and drink. I don’t drink at all, so it is not anything I would do in the first place, but I did have to question women driving a van full of children after partying with friends. I wondered about the mommy guilt if one of those women were to get into an auto accident, but then I thought, “well, live and let live”.
Then the upsetting and useless conversation I had with a Blogger named Stupidity Tracker who had linked to my Lotus Birth Picture Gallery and claimed this lifestyle choice was not only stupid, but disgusting. We had a chat in his comment section and it was nasty evidence that some people in our society are not willing to live and let live. But must use profane and intolerant words to describe some of the lifestyle choices Paul and I chosen. (Huge profanity alert for this blogger)
It’s ironic that Ann Coulter is currently being skewered in the press and in the blogosphere for her use of a supposedly anti-gay slur. When I watched her on Hannity last night she explained her words the way that I had interpreted them, as a joke about political correctness, using a schoolyard taunt that she interpreted as the equivalent of calling someone a wuss. I wholeheartedly agree with her that John Edwards is a wuss, and while I would not use the F word the way she did, I still support her decision to use whatever words she feels are appropriate to share her message of conservatism and in satirizing liberals.
I’m not offended or angry that the Advice Goddess thinks our choice of having a family bed is crazy, or that someone called the stupidity tracker thinks I am an idiot. Cathy Seipp compared my lifestyle to witch doctoring last year and I had a fun debate with her regular commenters that ended where it always does, with name calling and me moving on to some more productive way to spend my time.
I wish we could all do a better job of living and let live. But for some reason Paul and I making this decision to live mostly out of the realm of medicine seems to bring up some intensely angry responses from those who learn of our lifestyle choices.
We all have to make choices for and in behalf of our children until they are old enough to choose for themselves how they will live. I like to think that the choices we have made have given them a foundation of wellness and health that they will be able to reap from for many years to come.
Ben has gradually been weaning from our Attached Parenting that the Advice Goddess has such a problem with. Paul and I have been encouraging him to sleep in his own bed for months now. He has a toddler bed in his brothers room. Most nights he will fall asleep in our bed and then we will carry him in to his own bed. But the past few weeks this has led to him complaining and whining in the mornings, angry at supposedly being betrayed by us not honoring his wishes. Paul has tried to reason with and encourage him for the past few days especially that he needs to be in his own room.
This morning when I woke up Paul was curled up in a ball with our little boy snuggled safely in his arms. When he awoke I asked him what time Ben came in to our bed. He chuckled and then sheepishly said that he had woke up at 5am and gone in to check on Ben, then picked him up and took him into our bed to make sure he was safe. I started to cry, so happy that my husband has such a tender heart and was so concerned about our little guy.
Often it takes an accident to put things into perspective about what is truly important when raising our children. Paul completely blamed himself for Ben’s accident, “I should have been watching him more closely, etc…” was what he said to me last night. I just reassured him that accidents do happen, and that we should be grateful that the golf club did not smack him in the eye or in his temple. It could have been so much worse.
I know on this blog that I am actively campaigning for mothers and fathers to live a more holistic lifestyle, but I would like to take the opportunity to emphasize that I support all parents making whatever choices they feel will give their own child the best life, and am very willing to live and let live….and pray that in learning how to tolerate each others life choices, we can have a bit of compassion for each other and not get lost in the emotion that seems to come up when people make choices that are the complete opposite of what we ourselves would make.
As for using derogatory cliche’s in describing political opponants beliefs. I do confess to enjoying that sort of judgement, and feel that a “fight fire with fire” approach is appropriate and justified for conservatives in politics. I try to keep my comments focused on blasting the ideologies of those I oppose, but sometimes do get into name calling, as in calling Mr. Edwards a wuss (and I was thinking specifically of his tolerance and wobbly response to his degenerate bloggers and his using the Coulter incident to raise money for his campaign).
One of the dudes at Free Republic suggested that everyone donate one red cent in Ann’s name to his campaign with a credit card and thus make him pay for the transaction. His victim status does have its privledges for now, but no way is he going to be the democrat candidate.
I am willing to live and let live in regards to family life, but for politics, well, that is when I take my gloves off and start pasting the other side with the toughest words I can comfortably use. Street fighting sometimes is the only way to deal with what is at stake in terms of our freedoms. And I have deep concerns that if we conservatives don’t get off our bums and fight hard, we will lose everything that is precious to us.
Hope that clarifys things somewhat for my readers.
Jenny Hatch