Two articles that in my opinion make the case for being a stay at home mother.
Having a baby ‘costs two months sleep a year’
I was at a baby shower recently and the host asked all of us who were guests to write a little piece of advice for the new mom who was expecting her first baby. Most of the experienced mothers talked about sleep. Tips on maximizing sleep during the early post partum days. And how crucial it is to sleep when the baby sleeps rather than getting all lost in cleaning the house or entertaining extended family members who may stop by for a week or two to spend time with the new baby. It was all great advice for a new mother.
I was watching one of those horrific baby stories on discovery a couple months ago and the woman who had welcomed the film crew into her life and her home during the final days of her pregnancy and new baby time was an OB who had all of these ideals about natural childbirth, breastfeeding, cloth diapers, and planned to go back to work at 4 weeks post partum. This poor woman had a c-section, stopped using the cloth diapers the first day because it was just too hard (this episode brought to you by Pampers) and by day five her little son was hospitalized because he was dehydrated and losing weight.
Poor momma was so consumed with welcoming her friends into her home to meet the babe, entertaining and looking good for the camera crew, and getting her life under control: you know, get the baby sleeping through the night, breastmilk established, and her body back to its original size two by one month post partum so she could go back to work “educating” other women on how to have a healthy baby that someone dear and precious sort of got lost in the shuffle…. her little boy, who was not getting enough fluids and had to be hospitalized.
It was a sad commentary on mothering today.
I wish women who desire to be mothers would just embrace the whole thing. It would make things so much better for our society if women would devote themselves to their children and husbands and just let the whole “having it all” thing go. I know trends are moving that way, and I applaud the women of today for the focus they all seem to be articulating in terms of being home for the babies.
I also read this article that talked about the new government studies that claim mom is better than pre school for toddlers.
New research agrees: Moms do it better
I spend most of my waking moments with our four year old and I can honestly say, about 50% of the time he annoys me. So many questions, so busy messing up my house. GO Go Go all day long. Today he is just this tasmanian devilish ball of energy. We are on spring break so everyone is home and yesterday his dad took him to the Denver Zoo all day long. He had a great time at the zoo, but today, with six inches of snow on the ground, he is bored and even though it is 11 am in the morning, he has already gotten into three fights with his brothers, and trashed the bedroom by pulling all of the board games out of the closet and dumping them around his bedroom and mine.
It is not easy mothering a four year old child. Yet I would not dream of putting him in a pre school or a day care. This is the year I believe he needs me most. To teach him manners and good habits of health. Proper eating and bathing, as well as how to be kind even when he feels like whacking someone in the head with a shovel. The goal is to civilize him before he goes to school and hopefully we are on track to do that. World net Daily has some strong views about home school and the writer of that article articulates them in her piece. I have not given up on public schools yet, but I pray that our children are good examples to their peers, and the time and energy invested in them by doing preschool and some elementary school at home has put them in a better position to be kind rather than engage in the mean and bullying behaviors of some of the children they attend school with every day.
I remember those years when I felt that five hours of sleep was a “good” night. And not necessarily all at once either. I was happy if I managed to get two hours before three am and three hours after three am. My daily nap, which is still an ingrained mommy habit, was crucial to my sanity, and I scheduled that one to three afternoon space as my sacred time to recharge my batteries before the afternoon rush of homework, supper, bedtime, and what I call my second shift. That nap is still the most important focused time of my day. It keeps me going because even when children are grown up, you still have late night stuff – the teenager who needs to talk, or the 18 year old who comes in late after a party, or the ten year old who has a fever, or the 12 year old who got freaked out watching 24 and needs to sleep on Mom and Dads floor.
Parenting doesn’t stop at 10 PM and then resume at 6 AM after a restfull nights sleep. It is a 24 hour a day full time job, and women need to be wise in making the choices that will enable them to stay healthy and do the work at hand.
Jenny Hatch