Whitney Johnson writes a BLOG at WhitneyJohnson.com
Here Dare to Dream web site is Here.
Westboro family steps back and reconsiders its priorities
By Rushmie Kalke TELEGRAM & GAZETTE STAFF
WESTBORO— A little over two years ago, life for the Johnson family was similar to that of many two-parent working families: Crazy schedules, tough commutes, stolen moments with each other and the kids, and always feeling that there wasn’t enough time for anything.
Whitney and Roger Johnson, both 44, of Westboro, decided that they needed to take control and improve the quality of their lives. So they quit their jobs, sold their 6,500-square-foot home in Southboro, downsized to an apartment in Westboro and made a conscious choice to get off the fast track.
A national movement called Take Back Your Time is trying to challenge the overstressed, overworked, and frenetic existence of many Americans. While not aware of this effort when they made their decision, the Johnsons represent the ultimate of those trying to escape the rat race. Next Tuesday has been named Take Back Your Time Day, designed to draw attention to the importance of individuals and families carving out time for enjoyment. The day is a project of the Center for Religion, Ethics and Social Policy at Cornell University.
After a 15-year career on Wall Street, Mrs. Johnson decided that commuting to New York City and traveling to Latin America as a media and telecom investment analyst for Merrill Lynch left little time for her family. The couple and their two children, David, 10, and Miranda, 5, moved to Southboro in 2001, when Mr. Johnson became a professor at the University of Massachusetts Medical School, but she kept her job in the city. Mr. Johnson said he was working close to 50 hours a week, and his wife, 80 to 90 hours.
Two and half years ago, Mr. Johnson stepped down from his job, and 18 months ago Mrs. Johnson decided to join him.
“Last year we said, ‘Let’s try other things and recalibrate our lives,’ ” she said.
It wasn’t without fear or other people saying they were crazy. Some of Mrs. Johnson’s work peers said to her, “Are you sure? You know you won’t be able to come back.”
Many women face the difficult choice of leaving work to spend more time with their family, but Mr. Johnson said that is even harder for men to do.
“There are a lot of people who say ‘That’s great,’ but there are a lot of people who just don’t get it,” he said. “There’s a social challenge that exists when you get rid of the prestige of your career … And that is exacerbated for me because I’m a guy. It’s not the norm, so you have to have self-assurance and not care what people think.”
The risk-reward has been worth it, Mrs. Johnson said. The family is more connected, especially being in smaller living quarters, where every decision is carefully negotiated.
“When I yell at the kids, I know that is because I am around them enough to discipline them,” Mrs. Johnson said. “As you spend time together, you are more connected and you can access your feelings.”
The walls of the apartment are covered with framed pieces of art, and on this night the table is set for dinner. While Mrs. Johnson sits on the velvety brown couch in the living room, Mr. Johnson cooks dinner, and David and Miranda work on homework or play with Golden, the family lizard.
“My mom is allergic to dog and cat hair,” explains Miranda.
Monday evenings are family nights and each day there are special rituals such as homework sessions, attending the children’s extracurricular activities and talking about each member’s best and worst moment of the day.
While the kids are at school, Mr. and Mrs. Johnson work on entrepreneurial endeavors, such as investing in start-up companies, writing television pilots, and volunteering at their kids’ school. Mrs. Johnson’s labor of love is setting up Dare to Dream, a support network for women. She is going to California for a speaking engagement and has written a children’s book on the theme of fulfilling dreams.
Appropriately, the couple is actively involved with their church community, as it was their faith that made them examine their time more closely. As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, they sought to observe Sunday as a day of rest while they were working.
They saw benefits to safeguarding a day for worship and family, and it became a precursor to leaving their jobs, Mrs. Johnson said.
The family is living off savings that they say will allow them to live income-free for another three to four years, and have a 401(k) retirement plan that they won’t touch until it’s time.
“We know we are incredibly fortunate,” Mrs. Johnson said. “Of course you are a little bit scared. But there is a confidence of having worked on Wall Street. If I could do that, then we can figure this out.”
More than ever, Americans are facing unprecedented demands on their time, causing stress and dissatisfaction, according to http://www.timeday.org. The Web site says that mandatory overtime is at near-record levels; on average, Americans work nearly nine full weeks (350 hours) longer per year than Western European workers; and working Americans average a little over two weeks of vacation per year, while Europeans average five to six weeks.
While the meaning of success has changed for Mrs. Johnson, she said that she would be disingenuous in saying that she didn’t want all the accolades of her former life while she was working to achieve them.
“Our society is very reward orientated,” she said.
The Johnson said their kids have benefited from having their parents around more, but they will have to learn how to balance the pressures of life for themselves.
“They’ll have to find out what they are comfortable with,” Mr. Johnson said. “There’ll be pressure on them as there was on us.”
Jenny Hatch